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S.M
连接： Aug 27, 2004
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性别和年龄： 女性, 23
国家：United Arab Emirates
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Re: Parents and Teenagers Gap?
November 24, 2007 - 07:32 AM
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you got a point here, thats also a big problem enlarge the distence between parents and children, that parents doesnt find time to listen and share their children in all the life's fields, and in their problems, or give them some time to understand their problems or the way they think.
it's also a common problem here in the gulf countries, same thing , parents go to work most of the day and they are no longer free for their children which is reason to make the gap.
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Ifeatu
连接： Apr 19, 2007
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Re: Parents and Teenagers Gap?
December 12, 2007 - 02:15 PM
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Africhika wrote:
godisaboy wrote:
From my point of view, parents are capable of acting as our best friends as well as mentors.They are more mature that us because their social and life experience.It is not difficult to get along well with them if we attempt to understand them from the bottom of our hearts.
i firmly agree. this so-called generation gap was created in america in the 1950s when marketers and tv networks started to cater to the youth. but the generation gap isn't real. it's just promoted by the media. parents are gifts. they understand us like no one else.
I agree with Africhika...I think the major problem is that we are allowing the media to raise our children (I don't have any, just in general) rather then the parents...I believe its every parents responsibility to put the media into perspective. Teach your children how to obtain information and to guard their hearts from frivolity.
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Chika
连接： Dec 24, 2003
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Re: Parents and Teenagers Gap?
December 12, 2007 - 08:03 PM
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Olowotee wrote:
Mothers are no longer S.A.H.M (acronymns for Sit At Home Mums). . . .every parent wants to work! and this inversely affects the communication link between mother and child. An average Lagosian worker in Nigeria wakes up as early as 5:00am and gets back from work probably 10:00pm at night. . . .where then is the time for adequate communication with the children and the teenagers?
This post was edited on: 2007-11-24 at 12:36 PM by: Olowoyeye Oluwatosin Anu
it is not only the mother who is responsible for communicating with the children , it is the father as well. fathers must make time with their children.
This post was edited on: 2007-12-12 at 08:08 PM by: Chika
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ugochukwu ndukwe
连接： Nov 10, 2007
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Re: Parents and Teenagers Gap?
December 12, 2007 - 08:57 PM
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The fact you tend to miss is that the only constant thing in the world is change which is trgered by a force which is usually fire.
Basically for there to be a gap in any relationship means that it lacks communication.
Come to think of it, Children learn faster from what they see and hear and technology is not helping out cos our parents are too occupied to notice that the most talked about digital divide have crept into our beautiful homes. A parent is supposed to bring up his/her baby tutoring him on how best to handle issues of life but when the child spends more time with his peers,thats where his love and energy will lie.
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Olowoyeye Oluwatosin Anu
连接： Oct 16, 2007
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Re: Parents and Teenagers Gap?
December 13, 2007 - 04:14 AM
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wigo wrote:
The fact you tend to miss is that the only constant thing in the world is change which is trgered by a force which is usually fire.
Basically for there to be a gap in any relationship means that it lacks communication.
Come to think of it, Children learn faster from what they see and hear and technology is not helping out cos our parents are too occupied to notice that the most talked about digital divide have crept into our beautiful homes. A parent is supposed to bring up his/her baby tutoring him on how best to handle issues of life but when the child spends more time with his peers,thats where his love and energy will lie.
you got some points right here wigo, and i do agree with you that some factors such as; technology, peer influence etc are gradually creeping in, creating an indelible gap between parents and teens! You can imagine the number of hours the teenager spend on internet, with peer groups etc. . . . compared with the time spent with their parents.
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Olowoyeye Oluwatosin Anu
连接： Oct 16, 2007
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Re: Parents and Teenagers Gap?
December 13, 2007 - 04:48 AM
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Africhika wrote:
Olowotee wrote:
Mothers are no longer S.A.H.M (acronymns for Sit At Home Mums). . . .every parent wants to work! and this inversely affects the communication link between mother and child. An average Lagosian worker in Nigeria wakes up as early as 5:00am and gets back from work probably 10:00pm at night. . . .where then is the time for adequate communication with the children and the teenagers?
This post was edited on: 2007-11-24 at 12:36 PM by: Olowoyeye Oluwatosin Anu
it is not only the mother who is responsible for communicating with the children , it is the father as well. fathers must make time with their children.
This post was edited on: 2007-12-12 at 08:08 PM by: Chika
It's true that fathers are inclusive in child-tutoring, but you know that the role and impact of a mother on a child cannot be overemphasised. . .. Actually, it used to be much better when only Fathers are preoccupied and mothers readily available for child-mentorship and tutorship. But things are no longer the same ever since mothers too have joined the busy-trend having no adequate time for their teens. . .it makes the communication gap wider.
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Kat
连接： Nov 20, 2007
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Re: Parents and Teenagers Gap?
December 13, 2007 - 08:47 AM
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Personally, I think that my parents know about some of the issues I, as a teenager, go through. They just don't understand how they affect me, or how I feel about what I go through. A lot of times they formulate what they think I'm thinking in their minds, and they are usually mistaken. I think parents have an idea of what it's like to be a teenager, they just don't know how their teenager feels, or what they are actually going through.
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Chika
连接： Dec 24, 2003
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国家：United States
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Re: Parents and Teenagers Gap?
December 13, 2007 - 09:32 AM
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Olowotee wrote:
Africhika wrote:
Olowotee wrote:
Mothers are no longer S.A.H.M (acronymns for Sit At Home Mums). . . .every parent wants to work! and this inversely affects the communication link between mother and child. An average Lagosian worker in Nigeria wakes up as early as 5:00am and gets back from work probably 10:00pm at night. . . .where then is the time for adequate communication with the children and the teenagers?
This post was edited on: 2007-11-24 at 12:36 PM by: Olowoyeye Oluwatosin Anu
it is not only the mother who is responsible for communicating with the children , it is the father as well. fathers must make time with their children.
This post was edited on: 2007-12-12 at 08:08 PM by: Chika
It's true that fathers are inclusive in child-tutoring, but you know that the role and impact of a mother on a child cannot be overemphasised. . .. Actually, it used to be much better when only Fathers are preoccupied and mothers readily available for child-mentorship and tutorship. But things are no longer the same ever since mothers too have joined the busy-trend having no adequate time for their teens. . .it makes the communication gap wider.
i have to disagree. fathers and mothers have EQUAL responsibility of child-raising. children need 2 figures in the household, not just the mother. it is not good for a father to work all day and never spend time with his children. that will negatively affect the child.
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Olowoyeye Oluwatosin Anu
连接： Oct 16, 2007
邮件 12
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国家：Nigeria
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Re: Parents and Teenagers Gap?
December 13, 2007 - 11:28 AM
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hi africhika
I could sense it that you're in absolute support of Women Liberation, ofcourse I am as well. . .. . . .but we can't deny the fact that it's got its side-effect most especially on the family?. Mothers are now becoming too preoccupied with a whole lot of activities, secular jobs, official appointments etc that they no longer have quality time with their family. and this i see is one of the reason for parents-teenagers Gap!
As for the fathers, I'm not disputing the fact that they've got roles to play. but that, you shouldn't expect their input to be same as that of the Mothers. . .they are bread winners, and at such, expected to do more work out there. . .but for the mothers? She's just got to find time and rebuild bridge the gap.. . . . .
Adolescence.. . . .it's an intermediary stage that need more of counselling, encouragement, support and cordial attention. and I bet you that most Mothers are good at this *
these are my views anyway  ,
This post was edited on: 2007-12-13 at 11:35 AM by: Olowoyeye Oluwatosin Anu
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Ifeatu
连接： Apr 19, 2007
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Re: Parents and Teenagers Gap?
December 13, 2007 - 11:35 AM
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I agree with Olowotee. The children always experience the worst of the imbalance of parenting. I believe its our responsibility to have balanced lifestyles and a working relationship before having children. We owe our children at least 18 years of our lives, both mothers and fathers, and no one person can do everything, that being said, someone has to give up roles and take on roles for the benefit of the family.
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Chika
连接： Dec 24, 2003
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国家：United States
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Re: Parents and Teenagers Gap?
December 13, 2007 - 11:36 AM
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Olowotee wrote:
hi africhika
I could sense it that you're in absolute support of Women Liberation, ofcourse I am as well. . .. . . .but we can't deny the fact that it's got its side-effect most especially on the family?. Mothers are now becoming too preoccupied with a whole lot of activities, secular jobs, official appointments etc that they no longer have quality time with their family. and this i see is one of the reason for parents-teenagers Gap!
As for the fathers, I'm not disputing the fact that they've got roles to play. but that, you shouldn't expect their input to be same as that of the Mothers. . .they are bread winners, and at such, expected to do more work out there. . .but for the mothers? She's just got to find time and rebuild bridge the gap.. . . . .
*
these are my views anyway,
well, i don't think women's liberation has anything to do with this discussion. i believe that the reason why God put 2 parents is because EACH parent has EQUAL influence.
mothers are no more important that fathers. fathers and mothers are equally important. they both need to spend time with their children.
the old mentlity is that fathers work and women take care of the children. however, this is not right in God's eyes.
fathers must talk to their children. nurture their children. counsel and advice them. but most fathers only make money, without spending time with the child. fathers must realize that they have to spend time with the kids, just as mothers should do.
This post was edited on: 2007-12-13 at 11:41 AM by: Chika
This post was edited on: 2007-12-13 at 11:42 AM by: Chika
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Olowoyeye Oluwatosin Anu
连接： Oct 16, 2007
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Re: Parents and Teenagers Gap?
December 13, 2007 - 11:49 AM
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ifeatuMbanugo wrote:
and no one person can do everything, that being said, someone has to give up roles and take on roles for the benefit of the family.
that's my point, you got it right there. . . .
@africhika
Ok, let's put women liberalization aside then.
the old mentality is that fathers work and women take care of the chidren . . and how old is this my dear? Cos nothing stops me from giving up my job to take care of my children if need demands it? and what is the essense of both parents working for donkey hours/years and got no 'good' children to show forth at the end of it all.
This is actually one of the major problems youth are facing. . . .they've got lots of challenges, yet no one to turn to for advise! elder ones seems too busy, parents are no where to be found and most of them eventually yeild to peer pressure. . . .
so many juvenile delinquents out there. . .and yet we keep blaming the youths! Parents, especially the mothers are TO BE BLAMED  .
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Chika
连接： Dec 24, 2003
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Re: Parents and Teenagers Gap?
December 13, 2007 - 11:56 AM
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Olowotee wrote:
ifeatuMbanugo wrote:
and no one person can do everything, that being said, someone has to give up roles and take on roles for the benefit of the family.
that's my point, you got it right there. . . .
@africhika
Ok, let's put women liberalization aside then.
the old mentality is that fathers work and women take care of the chidren . . and how old is this my dear? Cos nothing stops me from giving up my job to take care of my children if need demands it? and what is the essense of both parents working for donkey hours/years and got no 'good' children to show forth at the end of it all.
This is actually one of the major problems youth are facing. . . .they've got lots of challenges, yet no one to turn to for advise! elder ones seems too busy, parents are no where to be found and most of them eventually yeild to peer pressure. . . .
so many juvenile delinquents out there. . .and yet we keep blaming the youths! Parents, especially the mothers are TO BE BLAMED *.
what is a parent? a parent is one who nurtures, advises, protects, and provides resources (money, food, clothes, shelter) for their children. BOTH parents should spend adequate time with their children.
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Chika
连接： Dec 24, 2003
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Re: Parents and Teenagers Gap?
December 13, 2007 - 12:00 PM
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there is absolutely nothing wrong with a mother wanting to stay home to stay with her children.
HOWEVER, the mother needs help to raise, nurture, advise the children. this is where the father comes in. fathers must realize that along with being "breadwinners", they must spend quality time with the kids.
many fathers make money, make money, make money, make money, and they forget about spending time with the kids.
This post was edited on: 2007-12-13 at 12:02 PM by: Chika
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Olowoyeye Oluwatosin Anu
连接： Oct 16, 2007
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Re: Parents and Teenagers Gap?
December 14, 2007 - 05:54 AM
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@Africhika
I get the picture, that Fathers too should participate in this art of training. But, maybe you shouldn't have the mindset that it must be of equal input.
@All and Potential Fathers In The House! lol. . .
Pls and Please, learn to spend time with your loved ones. . .It's not enough to make phone calls, your presences and absence must be felt. These young ones really do need your support, love, care and ATTENTION!!!!.
This episode actually reminds me of an African family with a very busy Father! It happens that every morning, before the children wake up to go to School, the father is out of bed already and gone to work. . . .this happens every blessed weekdays and most weekends!!! He didn't realise it that he was deprieving his children the right of knowing him as their father!
And so, on this fateful day. . . .this busy father came back home not quite long he'd left the house because he forgot some important documents at home which he'd need in the office for the day! . . . Lo, to his utmost amazement. guess what one of the kids did when she saw him at the door? She ran back to her mother, shouting. . . . . . mummy, mummy you have a VISITOR!
This little lad actually thought that the daddy was a visitor, because she rarely knew him.
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